The post you were going to get today was set to be grand. It was supposed to have it all; intrigue, drama, excitement, adventure, romance, et al. Your beloved IronCityspy woke up early this morning to ensure the dozen or so of you would have a brand new entry to greet your day. Then this happened:
Thankfully I was able to save a transcript of this morning:
8:25 a.m [IronCityspy]: “What a glorious Winter morning! [checks watch] Aces, I’ll be 10 minutes early for work today! [Begins to whistle].
8:31 a.m. [IronCityspy enters Dupont Metro, all escalators are broken]: “Well this is highly irregular… I am sure this is just some sort of preventative maintenance for all of our safety!”
8:33 a.m. Metro leaves Dupont Station en route to Shady Grove
835 a.m. Metro arrives at Woodley Park
836 a.m. Metro abruptly stops in-between Woodley Park and Cleveland Park. [Train conductor]: “We’ll be moving shortly — there is a small issue on the track ahead”.
8:45 a.m. [Train conductor, shouting]: “THERE IS A SITUATION AHEAD. WE NEED TO TURN AROUND AND HEAD BACK TO DUPONT. REMAIN SEATED!!!”. Fellow passengers appear to either be praying or making some sort of final preparations.
8:48 a.m. Train safely arrives at Dupont Station. [Train conductor]: “This train will continue on to Shady Grove. Do not leave train”. [New passengers heading in the direction of Shady Grove pile on].
8:53 a.m. [Train Conductor] “Attention passengers, this train is headed towards Glenmont. All headed to Shady Grove please disembark”
8:54 a.m. [IronCityspy has aneurysm]
So if you are keeping count at home, DC’s public transportation took 30 minutes to get me to the exact spot I started from. And what was the issue that caused the the train conductors to prepare for the rapture? Why a small insulator fire on the track. I don’t even know what a metro insulator is, but I am willing to bet my life wasn’t exactly hanging on the precipice.
Metro, as a rule I try not to complain about you too much. I knew when I signed up to live here that I’d be dealing with the clown college of the urban transportation systems. But you caused my beloved readers to miss out on a masterpiece — something I can not forgive.