The winner. Ridiculous. Click for larger version
So. A certain friend of mine regularly competes in this annual DC contest where you make dioramas out of Peeps. Yes, the Easter candy. So what? Its not like you do super cool things in your spare time. Anyways, last year she spent more days than are socially acceptable to create an elaborate cherry – blossom – jefferson – memorial – peep – festival diorama only to be excluded from the slide show in favor of, what were in her opinion, far inferior entries (and i agree).
Hardened and bitter, she swore she would never spend time on peeps again. Well. Until this year. Armed with cotton balls, peeps, paint and resentment, she constructed “the snowpeepalypse” in a final vying run. And was she a finalist???
Once again she was spurned. But this time, she felt the competition was much stronger, and has gracefully accepted her place in the peep hierarchy. So, if you are looking to procrastinate at work, here is your answer:
the 2010 Peep Show winners brought to you by the Washington Post. Yes, the Washington Post. They are AMAZING! Enjoy!
So I was walking around Pentagon City mall yesterday and saw this:
God. I had forgotten how creepy mall Easter bunnies were. Even for adults. Such large, hollow dead eyes. Weird human clothes. Usually silent, just staring and nodding in their garden habitats of picket fencing and fake flowers. I decided to look at other Easter bunnies around the country for comparison. Not much better. I mean, they tended to look like this:
From left: Wyoming, Hawaii, Virginia (Alexandria)
Jesus. Especially Hawaii, what were you thinking? Could you imagine walking up that red path to that thing? That silent creepy dead-eyed thing? The kids are trying, they are. They cannot logically put together where they are and what they are doing, and what that rabbit is, but I mean neither can I. They just know they will be sitting on that warm man-bunny lap until they smile, and eventually (well sometimes) they relent.
So parents, for the sake of your children, just skip the bunny this year. The Bunny is not Santa Claus, there is no American cultural thread of talking to a giant bunny on Easter. It’s just another photo op that terrifies your children to be sent in a card that the recipients barely look at anyways. That’s what I would do at least. And I bet that Jesus agrees.