So for god knows what reason, vehicles keep failing this week. A public bus burst into flames, a UPS truck crashed into the Hirshhorn Museum, and a car crashed through the window of Rhodeside Grill in Arlington (hopefully sparing some of their delicious chicken wings and clipping some UT fans). No, not killing the fans, people. I am not terrible. I just hope one or two may have been startled as they were doing that stupid longhorn thing with their hand, that’s all.
So, in a wonderful coincidence for cyclists everywhere, these failures are coinciding with the month of May, which is Bike Month in the district. May 21st is bike to work day, and May 23rd (Saturday) is Bike DC when tons of streets around the city are closed to cars. There are also talks about the Giro d’Italia race coming to DC, a tip my dear (now ex) friend decided to give DCist instead of DCspy, because he is useless. Anyways, the whole month is supposed to make the idea of biking to work more accessible to people, dispelling myths traffic navigation, bike lanes etc.
To be honest, this whole thing gets mixed reviews from DCspy. On one hand I am an environmentalist, so I love public transport, carpooling and anything that gets cars off the road. However, as someone who walks to work, I despise bicyclists. Sorry, I do. They want to be cars, yet they run lights, stop signs, weave in and out of traffic, and go up on the sidewalk when the streets are too crowded (something that they are apparently legally allowed to do in the District. I have also been hit by a bicycle head-on once and almost hit by one numerous times, mostly when bikes decide to do their sidewalk-street weaving. In short, my patience has worn thin.
But bicyclists of DC, despite my objections, I have decided to support your bike month as it promotes cleaner air and fitter people. However, I have three conditions. 1) If you say you are a car, then be one dammit. Don’t go all Sarah-Palin on traffic rules and endanger pedestrians 2) Dress appropriately for day-to-day bicycling. No crazy neon cycling suits, you are not Lance Armstrong, and no flowing dresses that expose that which is not meant to be seen in the wind.
And finally 3) Ditch the snobbery. Look, I understand that bicycling is undergoing a hipster throwback renaissance, but it is just one of many things you can do to help mother earth. Should you encourage people to try it? Sure, just remember to leave the smug eco-persona at home. You don’t want to be this.