“Hashing:” Another mass drinking event I am too lazy to participate in

Despite having a blog, I am the last to know about any hip organized drinking event. Relay races, organized games of tag, capture the flag, you name it, I miss it. Probably because I am not that observant and tend to avoid blogs that have a lot of words. Meh. I get tired of knowledge. ANYWAYS, yesterday I was introduced to “hashing” in Dupont. Hashing looks like this:

Yeah, so basically a lot of people (mostly guys) run in a pack to bars, which they locate by following chalk marks on the ground. In Dupont yesterday, it looked pretty hip and impromptu. Like a prom dance sequence from random-early-2000s-movie-X. Turns out, like those dance sequences, that is definitely NOT the case. Here’s what it actually is…

Started by the Brits in Malaysia in the 1930s as a way to relax after work, the “hash house harriers” club  has this one guy “the hare” setting out clues for the rest the “harriers” to follow, until they finally end up at a tub of beer (or now, a bar). There are divisions called “kennels” all over the U.S., and has the motto of “a drinking club with a running problem.” It then comes with its own set of chalk symbols and member nicknames and code lingo like this:

SUPER complicated. I know. Liking drinking and codes and planning and officialness and communal laughter. I was obviously suspicious, but, wanting to be a somewhat decent blogger, I contemplated trying a run. That is, until I researched and saw the ad for the Dupont run I witnessed yesterday (NSFW):

JESUS. Crude, homophobic, you couldn’t PAY me enough. Another potentially cool thing ruined by stupid stupid frattiness. Look. An organized run could be fun for people. Not me personally, because I tend to stick drinking (and sloth) with sloth and running (and active) with active, but you know what I mean. However, nobody wants to join another stupid adult frat.

Now, maybe the other clubs such as white house harriers and DC hash house harriers are less fratty, but I have no idea. They all have annoying sexual nicknames too it seems. If it were me, I would stick to maybe the Red Dress Run (their big annual run: 600+ people) and call it a day. OR even better, walk to a bar with friends and simply enjoy happy hour.

Way to ruin a potentially good thing, broseph.

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